“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.”
I sometimes think, “Karen, you shouldn’t say that”
I sometimes think, “Karen, you shouldn’t write that.”
The writing is what will get me into trouble. Once I write it, I usually memorialize. It’s my mental photograph.
I resurrected this blog draft this evening. I thought it odd on an evening of a day when words were not at the forefront of my mind or fingertips, I found a draft about writing and speaking.
Oh, the reservations we have about being honest. There’s a reason brutal is used to describe it. We sugarcoat so much in life that when we are honest the veil is removed and we nor our subject may like what is revealed. The truth is sanctifying, cleansing, tortuous, liberating, sorrowful, and joyful.
This draft was a blog I started when I began a writing class earlier this year. Moving from improvisation to sketch comedy, I joined ten others and together we wrote more than 50 sketches, a portion of which we’ll produce and act in a show next Spring. I was afraid. And I felt small in the company of my peers. It seemed like a heavy lift at the outset. Writing sketch is different from Improv. By writing something I’m memorializing it. Using my words, casting my fellow players to make them come to life. It requires a different kind of vulnerability than improvisation. And a whole lot more of humility. You can compare the stakes to dating. The game of nervousness and anticipation mixed with worry. “Will I reveal too much, or not enough?” In either scenario, we are judged. We allow it. We invite it. We let them determine if we are funny or pretty?
But they don’t have the last word.
We do. No one person or audience owns our joy. Ultimately, each one of is responsible for it.
Sure, I sometimes ask myself, “Self, what will people think of me if I say that or write this?” And, while I think it’s a good exercise to consider your audience to temper decisions, ultimately, I do what I want. I do what I need, and that’s being honest.
And this is my final draft about that.